


Happy New Year

by Bittodeath



Series: KuroDai Week 2018 [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1980s, Alternate Universe - America, Angst, Character Death, Cigarettes, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, HIV/AIDS, Heartbreak, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Love, M/M, Military Backstory, Sad Ending, Slurs, Terminal Illnesses, Topping from the Bottom, Unsafe Sex, military!Daichi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-09
Updated: 2018-05-09
Packaged: 2019-05-04 10:53:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14591472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bittodeath/pseuds/Bittodeath
Summary: Summer 1985, USA - Kuroo has given up on everything he loved, including Daichi.Daichi understands, and goes along.The question is, why did Daichi come back?





	Happy New Year

**Author's Note:**

> I'd advise your to read the tags carefully, as there are many TW in this sole work. The prompt I chose is "Bad Habits" and it quickly escalated to this. In advance, I'm sorry.

The sky was an endless blue. It was dizzying. Not a cloud in sight, except the grey one puffing out from Kuroo’s mouth. He took a drag of his cigarette, blew the smoke high up in the air. Tapped lightly on the stick without watching – the ashes fell to the ground. He didn’t care.

The roof of the car was warm under his back, almost too warm from the blazing sun above him. There wasn’t a sound around. The city had yet to extend here – endless crops all around him, barren now that it all had been reaped. He brought the cigarette back to his lips, the ashen taste, acrid smoke burning his tongue and his lungs. Sometimes, he hoped it would burn his life away.

He bent his knee, bringing his foot down on the roof, his shoe making a heavy “thunk” as it collided with the scraped metal. He started to beat an imaginary rhythm. Here, between endless blue and endless yellow, it felt like nothing else existed. He nearly burnt himself on the metal of the hood. He didn’t care.

He faintly heard the crunching of fallen crops under heavy boots – military boots – and he sighed, grinding his cigarette butt into the metal of the car. He flicked it away.

“I knew I’d find you here.”  
“Can’t you see I’m trying to find some peace here?” he grunted, turning his head to watch the new comer.  
“It’s not peace you’re searching for”, Daichi snorted, hoisting himself on the rook with him. “You’re just fleeing.”  
“Go away, Dai. I don’t want you here.”

Daichi’s eyes twitched in anger, and the man huffed.

“You know what, Tetsu? You’re just a big fucking coward, that’s what you are. Trying to convince you it doesn’t matter, that you can just disappear. Well I have some fucking news for you: you can’t.”  
“Oh please, have you come just for that? Has saint Daichi come down from his pedestal just to frown at me? I don’t want you here, so get moving.”  
“You can’t run away from me forever”, Daichi retorted.  
“I can’t? Watch me fucking do it”, Kuroo replied. “Get away.”  
“I won’t let you”, Daichi seethed, and in a matter of second, he was above him, his whole weight dropped on Kuroo’s crotch. “I won’t let you deny me. Deny us.”

Kuroo’s heart missed a beat at the feeling of him _there_ , and he nearly tried to throw him off before remembering the height. It was not much, but it could so easily be fatal.

“So what”, Kuroo hissed. “You will ruin every chance of a future, of a normal life you have, all for what? A few months of pleasure before the fall? Is that what you want?”  
“What if I told you yes?”  
“As if”, Kuroo snorted. “You have your path carved before you, Dai. Look at you, first of your promotion, best sniper in the country. It’s all logical from here. You will have an amazing career and marry some sweet blond girl back in the country and have three amazing children and a fucking dog in your fucking garden and live this fucking _American Dream_ you wanted so much while I’ll be rotting six feet under.”  
“What if I told you”, Daichi breathed, bending slightly, and hell Kuroo could see his muscles playing under his black tank top, and if he wanted something, it was _that_ , “that’s no longer an option? What if I told you my American Dream is dead and gone, and all I want is all the time we can have together?”

Kuroo dropped his eyes from Daichi’s face to the thighs encasing his torso, and he smoothed his hands up his thighs, across the thick military pants.

“I’d say”, Kuroo breathed, “that you’re a damn liar, Daichi.” Slowly, he rolled his hips up into him, grinding his semi there to make sure Daichi was aware of it.

Daichi’s fingers slid under his t-shirt, splaying across his stomach, and really, this was going too far already and he should stop it now. He grabbed Daichi’s wrist.

“Stop it”, he warned, staring into his eyes.  
“Why?”  
“We’d both regret it.”  
“I don’t think so” Daichi breathed. “Unless you’re talking about how damn hot the roof is getting, in which case I agree we should take it to the backseat. Or I could just stay like this, it doesn’t take much naked skin, does it?”  
“Stop playing dumb, Daichi, you know perfectly well what I meant”, Kuroo growled. “As much as I’d love to fuck you into the backseat, it’s not gonna happen anytime soon. It’s not gonna happen, period.”  
“What, not comfortable enough for you? Mister Kuroo needs his wide double-bed and pancakes in the morning?” Daichi teased, lightly humping against him. “I’m not against that, mind you, but the backseat seems nice enough.”  
“Daichi”, Kuroo called, louder, digging his fingers into the flesh of his thighs. “Stop. I’m not doing that to you.”

Daichi leaned back, packing Kuroo’s pockets until he found his cigarette pack. He flicked it open, pulled out one with his teeth, closed the pack and lit the stick with a swish of his lighter. Kuroo was staring at him, dumbfounded.

“And since when does saint Daichi smoke?”  
“Since I found out I’ve got only a few months left”, Daichi replied, puffing out the smoke. He coughed and pulled the cigarette away, grimacing, before he stuck it between Kuroo’s lips. “Nope, that shit is still disgusting.”

Kuroo rose up suddenly, grabbing his shoulders and shaking him. The cigarette fell on the car, still burning.

“WHAT?!”  
“Stop that, Tetsu”, Daichi whined.  
“How can you drop something like that on me?” Kuroo cried out, his hands trembling.  
“What, everyone around us is dying, how is it so ground-breaking?” Daichi laughed bitterly, opening his arms wide. “The thing is both you and I are dying, so I want none of your “concern for my future” bullshit. You get it?”

Kuroo’s trembling hand stroke Daichi’s cheek as he observed him. There were unshed tears in his eyes.

“I had so many grand dreams for you”, Kuroo breathed. “I would have given everything for that.”  
“And you did”, Daichi replied, grabbing his hand and pressing a kiss against his palm. “You sacrificed what we had to save me. You did it out of love and I can never be thankful enough that I got to be with you. That I got to know you.”  
“I’m sorry”, Kuroo said, breaking down into tears. “I’m s-sorry, Daichi”, he sobbed, and Daichi hugged him close.  
“I know”, Daichi breathed. “I know you are. But now it doesn’t matter, does it? If we’re both going to die, I want to spend all the time I’ve got left with you.” He smiled, heartbroken. “I want to end this year with a bang. I want to get to make love to you. Will you let me have that, Tetsu?”

Kuroo wiped his tears and nodded, still shaking.

“How… We never… How could you…”  
“Because I haven’t caught it”, Daichi whispered. “It’s something else entirely.”  
“Then surely…”  
“There is nothing we can do about it”, Daichi replied, shaking his head. “The doctors said it’s a cancer. They didn’t give me much time.” He shrugged. “I got discharged. They can’t do shit with an ill soldier, can they? Anyway, it’s here the real war is.”  
“It’s chaos, Dai”, Kuroo whispered. “I come here because… There’s peace, here. And sometimes… Sometimes I feel like I can hear their voices. My friends.”

Daichi tightened his grip on his hand, and tried to smile.

“Care to present me?”  
“You’d associate with the likes of me?” Kuroo said with a smile. “Mister Good Guy, out with that damn faggot?”  
“You’re forgetting I love that damn faggot”, Daichi replied fondly. His hand tightened on Kuroo’s nape. “Kiss me, Tetsu. Kiss me.”

This time, Kuroo didn’t protest. Instead, he captured Daichi’s lips with his own, rabid, wanting. He had waited so damn long for this – forsaken so damn much, all for nothing. Their kisses quickly grew frantic and passionate, from months of pent up frustration. Months of longing. Kuroo realized Daichi was still straddling his thighs and started to knead his flesh, sliding his hands under his tank top.

“I want you”, he whispered. “I’ve been wanting you all along.”  
“Take me”, Daichi replied, biting his lips. “I’ve waited long enough.”

He pushed Kuroo back down on the roof, which was now boiling hot, and slid a hand over his tented pants. He fondled him – clumsily but passionately – and retrieved the fallen cigarette, still lit, which he stuck back between Kuroo’s lips. His fingers quickly opened his flies to pull him out and Kuroo whined around the stick when his lips closed around him.

“Daichi”, he called. “Damn.”  
“I like it much better than your damn cigarette”, Daichi replied from between his legs, bent over him with a sly grin.

Kuroo’s finger threaded his hair, urging him on, guiding him gently as he gasped softly, panting in pleasure.

“You look so good like this”, Kuroo said, putting off the cigarette that threatened to burn his fingers. “Where did saint Daichi go?”  
“Found his heaven, I guess”, Daichi said cheekily, leaning his cheek against his thigh. “As much as I’m loving blowing you for the first time ever, I’m burning my hands off. How about we get down from here?”  
“You are an absolute idiot”, Kuroo replied, his voice fond, as they staggered of the car and clambered into the backseat. He hadn’t bothered to tuck himself back into his pants. He bent over the front seats to retrieve the lube and, when he turned back, Daichi was already half naked. In fact, only his tank top was still on, with his dog-tag hanging on his chest.

Kuroo’s heart thumped loudly at the sight. This was no innocent move from Daichi – it was a reminder of _before_ , when they were still together, when they were first together, as much as Kuroo had tried to make it seem it was just to embarrass Daichi and see where he would stop. He snorted when he remembered how, dumbly, he had thought Daichi would back out – because, come on, Daichi, gay? That was so unlikely he hadn’t believed it. Which had led to him blowing Daichi in a back room at a party – back then, he didn’t know he was condemned yet. It seemed to be so long ago.

“Stop staring and give me that”, Daichi sighed, grabbing the lube from his hand and putting some on his fingers.  
“Wait, what the _hell_ are you doing?” Kuroo called, scrambling to get it back.  
“Prepping, of course”, Daichi replied with a smile and a wink, which definitively fried Kuroo’s brain-cells.

The sight of him fingering himself open certainly didn’t help, nor the way he bit into the fabric of his top to keep it up. Finally, he managed to cope.

“Wait, I can’t let you bottom”, he mumbled, trying to get his brain to work with a minimal amount of blood. The rest had gone south and showed no sign of wanting to come back.  
“Like I’m gonna let you stop me”, Daichi snorted as he moved to push Kuroo into the backseat, straddling his lap. “A little help would be welcome, though.”  
“Oh God”, Kuroo groaned, gripping his cock tightly to steady it as Daichi started to sink down on him.  
“Fuck, I’m so regretting this dumb decision”, Daichi said through gritted teeth when he was about halfway in.

That made Kuroo snort and he slid his hands under his thighs to help him up.

“Told you so”, he chided him. “Here, let me.”

He kept him steady as he gave shallow thrusts, helping him accustom the foreign sensation and slowly sliding in deeper and deeper, until he was bottoming up, shivering. Daichi was still very tight, and definitely warm, and he had never thought he could experience this one day. Daichi was trembling against him, panting lightly in his ear.

“How does it feel?” Kuroo breathed. “Is it too much? Want me to stop?”  
“Keep going”, Daichi replied, his voice low and soft, “please.”

And he kept on going, slow and steady, marking Daichi’s neck heavily, fingers digging into his thighs. At first, Daichi was silent, safe from soft pants, but then moans started to rise, higher and higher. Kuroo could feel his length rubbing between their stomach, and he welcomed his climax with a sigh of pleasure. His pace increased to something rabid and passionate that had Daichi clinging to him for dear life until he finally spent.

“I love you”, Daichi breathed, his eyelashes sticky from his tears, cheeks red and stained as he bent to kiss his lips.  
“I love you too, Daichi”, Kuroo replied, kissing him back. “Until the very end.”

*

Daichi tightened his grip on Kuroo’s shoulders through the covers when the fireworks finally lit up the night sky above them. The fields were just as empty as that day, but it was colder, now. Just the two of them in a world of black, stained with bright colours. He nuzzled Kuroo’s hair, fingers closing around his bony arm.

“Happy New Year, love”, he whispered softly.

There was no response. He could have thought Kuroo was sleeping – but the truth was, Kuroo wasn’t. He had stopped breathing a few minutes ago and it had taken all Daichi had not to curse at the sky. But even his all couldn’t stop the tears forming in his eyes and spilling on his cheeks. The cold lump of the handgun under his legs felt colder than ever.

“I hope 1986 is going to be a fucking good year”, he added, pressing fervid kisses to Kuroo’s lips. “I love you. I love you so damn much.”

He gently rocked Kuroo’s thin, frail body against his own, still trying to give off some warmth. But in the end, it was just him and an endless darkness – endless silence.

A gunshot.

Then silence.

**Author's Note:**

> So I know many things were implied in there, but I hope it was understandable.


End file.
